FEED ME. [英語・日本語あり]

GOOD MORNING! GOOD AFTERNOON! AND GOOD EVENING!

:O While I’m taking a break from wrestling I’ll be taking on private students who are interested in learning English and want to become more confident in speaking English. If you’re interested, send me a message.  MEAT MEAT MEAT. BYE.

おはようございます!こんにちは!こんばんわ!

プロレスやすみちゅ、英語ならいたいひとまたは英語のじしんもちたいひとにおしえることをはじめたいとおもいます!きょうみあるかた、れんらくちょだい!肉肉肉。おわり!

Bulletproof

I know.  I’m obsessed with the idea of strength.  Though that idea changes and evolves as I continue flopping and clawing through this life.  I understand that there is more than just physical power.  Inner strength, mental fortitude is necessary to navigate through the crap that can get thrown at you by angry monkeys and dickheads who can’t take care of their own shit.  I think it’s ok to compartmentalize, or to have a wall and be cold, or be open and completely vulnerable like an idiot child who just hopes for the best.  Maybe I should take turns using these defenses instead of just using one.  HAHA…I think the completely vulnerable one is what I’ve been using lately.  Just being open and letting all the different emotions hit.  Take it.  Accept it. And move on.  Though…sometimes you get tired and that’s when it’s time to rotate your defense.  Mmm..maybe what matters really is which defense you use and when you use it.  Timing is everything isn’t it?

Anyways this probably doesn’t make sense to anyone.  It doesn’t really make sense to me either…just words…falling from my head and combining on screen.

I’ve been out on a break from wrestling for 3 weeks now.  I have a lot of mixed feelings about it.  I do feel crazy not being able to run around and kick and jump on people, but it was nice to have some down time to hermit and see my friends.  It was a good time to reflect, watch movies, wrestling vids, and read (kinda — I’m not supposed to concentrate too hard or supposedly my brain would explode ~.~)  Overall, it’s been really frustrating not being able to do what makes me feel good or happy.  But I guess it was a good thing.  I don’t often get the chance to reflect, write in this blog and sound like weirdo.  LUCKY!

I’m gonna work on a new costume then go float in the ocean for a while.  Dear online journal and eyes that come across my rants, thanks for existing.
I often don’t know what I’m doing or where I’m going.  But thanks for being here with me, assholes.  I love you all.

sis fam JenK AK trunk KYboy RYS KY YURI GAIJIN YOLO oedomore KM JK listnuse2 listnuse mari oedotai fuka jkt oedo

DONE DONE DONE. NOW I’M GONNA GO EAT MEAT. BLKDSJ:LDSKH:LASKJd;lJSDLIWOEIJLSDKAKDJ

Push

The women I work with are warriors(戦士) and legends(伝説). Sometimes my mind can’t wrap around the thought of what I’m doing amongst them.

Because I feel like a puppy when I’m around them.  Excited and amazed at every new discovery and chance to try something new.  Lol of course at times this puppy is aware that it might get kicked in the face if it makes the wrong move.

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But I am where I want to be.

Last match in Shin-Kiba it was Kim-chan and I versus Nanae Takahashi and Hojo Kairi.  They are an amazing team. I saw first hand why they’re the tag team champions. Kim of course was awesome. Watching her battle it out with Nanae were some of my favorite moments of the match.  Kim is trying to help me think more so I’m more aware of everything around me. I really like working with her.

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Afterwards I met up with some of my friends that waited for me after the event. ;_; they waited in the cold for so long!! I felt really bad and just wanted to hug them. When I came around they took advantage of the fact that I’m a walking heater and stuffed their hands into my shirt and stole my heat. It was ok though, I really appreciated them coming and sticking around. When my friends are around I think I feel really excited and I don’t pay so much attention to the aches my body may feel ^^.

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「insert photo of Jun, Andrew, and new friend Mike here」

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I just like this photo *^^*

This weekend we’re going to Iwaki and Hakata!
このしゅうまついわきと博多にいきます!

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In Iwaki I’ll face Mystique.
And in Hakata it’s me and Kim versus Yoneyama and Hatsuhinode.
I’m excited for both matches. Finally, another single! Mystique has a totally different style from me so I’m really interested to see what happens! And of course I’m excited to go back to Kyushu! Wrestling, friends, food, all of it! I can’t wait!  Ok…seriously though..I’ve been ignoring my stomach and now it’s mad at me. I have to take care of it. Til next time, what will you be doing this weekend? If you’re in Japan or Kyushu, will you be coming to the show?

Peace out my lovelies.

P.S. Editing later for more Japanese..but..now…time for food

Week in Review…2 weeks? ugh…I’m terrible with time.

Hey there, fellow meat eaters.  Hello to you as well my leaf loving friends.
さしぶり、ね?

ブログはぶずかし!たくさんことかきたいけどじかんない!
I’ve been wanting to write in this thing for a while now, but haven’t really been able to sit down and process these past two weeks.

A lot of things have been happening, and it’s been quite up and down for me lately.  I feel like the crossroad that I’ve been approaching is now suddenly beneath my feet and I have to make a choice.  ..Which I hate…because I want to do everything…be everything.

せんたくしのじかん。どうしお?たくさんしんぱい。たくさんストレスあります。ぜんぶやりたい、ぜんぶなりたい。でも、できますか?

Again..time plays a big role in this.  A friend asked me what I want to be doing in 5 years…I couldn’t tell her.  To be honest I’ve never really known where I was headed.  My path has always been based off of selfish whims.  Which are difficult on those who care about me.  Because it seems like my decisions keep taking me further and further away from them.

I can’t tell you what’s gonna happen next in my life, but I have a lot of thinking to do.  In the meantime, I’m going to eat some meat do some more chores and then head to practice.

すぎわからない。今からお肉をたべますとれんしゅうにいきます。

For those of you studying Japanese or English, what are some of the things you did to learn the language?  Clearly I’m in a situation where I need to use Japanese..and that’s how I’ve been learning.  But lately..I feel like I’ve hit a wall.  I pick up new words through conversation…but using them and proper sentences is completely different.

Here are some photos from the past couple of weeks!

1415926096718For  Halloween, Jun and I dressed up as JK.
JK = Joshi Kosei (School Girls), Just Kidding, Jun and Kris

1415926082356 And I got to meet Jun’s mama!  Good job, lady! And Happy Birthday!! ❤
じゅんちゃんのおかあさんにあいました!おつかれさまです!とおめでとう!

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The last event at Korakuen Hall I had these lovely ladies cheering for me!
I was really really happy to see them there!
まえのしあい私のともだちおえんしました!うれしかった!

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I love…yakiniku.
やきんくだいすき。

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The girls of Stardom, and me looking…hungry and lost.

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We had a photoshoot thing in Yokohama. And I jumped around.
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Of course I enjoyed some time working with Jun at Listn.me
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And I met Kiki’s mother.
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And a guy with a smaller mustache!
wpid-1415926157920.jpgMe and the people I work with…getting the one thing we all really need.

’til next time!
またね!

Yesterday’s match results:
きのうのしあいせいか
Win: 1
Loss: 1

LOL and in that order. ;D
おもしろかった。I had fun! @_@;;;

My body is stiff and sore, but I feel like I’m getting stronger.
からだつかれったけどすこしずつつよいなります。
And I love the feeling of learning that comes with every match…and every practice.
れんしゅうとしあいでたくさんべんきょうします。うれしかった。

After our Halloween match, Starfire and I took a photo with the legendary Hayabusa!
しあいあとでスタ ーファイヤたちしゃしんとりましった。はやぶささん!
すごい!

 

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It was a good day.

 

Io-san’s group used this for their entrance music for the Halloween Event.
(イオさんのハロウェンのおんがく。)

ダンスしたい!

Today I plan on …eating meat…and quite possibly…dancing. What will you do today?  ^^ Cheers!!

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^ This is my mask, Shadow!

Stability. じかん。

Some part of us always searches for a little piece of it.  Safety, stability, the familiar.  I’d be lying if I said I didn’t want it.  Partially at least.  I find myself missing people lately.  These past 10 years have passed like a blur.  These past 2 and a half years in Japan seem even faster.  Occasionally, my mind will slow down long enough to register where I am and what I’m doing, but it isn’t long until the cogs start to turn and I’m on the move again.  Some have called it running, others evolving.  I’m not sure which…though I have a feeling it’s a bit of both.  Though my situations and locations have been reset numerous time, as a person I’m still building upon the experiences of the past.  Many things change, few things stay the same.  One of the things that I still believe is that “I have no time.”

It never feels like I have enough time to complete the tasks or things I want to do.  Though maybe the trick is just to move faster?  GAH.  A friend once told me that my anxiousness stemmed from worrying too much about the future and not enjoying the present enough.  I dunno. I think I’m a pretty selfish person and enjoy the present quite a bit and don’t think enough about the future.  But I’m aware.  Or at least I think I feel like I can do more, be more.  …here’s where the rigidity inside of me says something like, “Then do more! DO IT!”

The counter voice shouts out, “ASS.  You have a billion projects going on and you hardly sleep.  How the fuck can you do more than you are?”

More more more.  “Limits only exist in your head!”

“SLEEP.”

“NO TIME!”

And so the fight continues.  Myself arguing with myself over choices and actions, though the headstrong “DON’T STOP, CAN’T STOP” voice always wins out.  Lucky I guess.  At least it keeps me moving and active.

Dammit! I really was trying to write an entry focusing on the match I had last Sunday against Hazuki and Azumi…but I’m really not very good at writing about events…or even memories!

I think the only thing I’m really in tune with is writing about how I feel in the moment…which is usually hungry.  But I’ll work on it.  For now, know that I won that last match…and I thank the meat I’ve devoured ’til this point for making me so heavy.  I actually had a really good day.  It was super sunny and I saw the moon in the morning!  Sorry if my thoughts sound moody.  I’m doing well.  :O I just want more time.

じかんない。じかんがほしい。たくさんやりたい。よくなりたい。ฅ^•ᴥ•^ฅ

3 ways, Tag teams, and homies

[inner dialogue]

Kris 1: I thought you said you wanted to write more so you could remember your experiences..
(えええ。。。あなたはじぶんのけいけんをおぼえておきたい。。おもいます。かいてないよ。)

Kris 2: I thought you would remind me to write.
(あなたはわたしをおもいださなかった。)

Kris 1&2: (~.~);;;

I’m pretty awful at remembering things. X.x Which is why I think it’s important to write things down. >_<

Kris 1: Shoulder to the wheel ne?

Kris 2: Sou da ne! Get working!

My first month of wrestling was filled with 3 way matches against Hazuki Reo and Hatsuhinode. Both of them are very different wrestlers, but I feel like I learned a lot from them.

thetotempole

(Like totem poles can be dangerous >.<)

For the final 5 Star Grand Prix event, I teamed up with Hatsuhinode…which was weird..because I really just wanted to eat her mask, but ok. New experiences, yay!  >.> It was fun…but we lost. ~_~ I guess we don’t make a very good team. It’s all for the best though!  This time I’ll be paired up with Kimura-san in the Tag League! <>.<> I will surely eat Hatsuhinode’s mask then! *^_^* Afterwards..I did have a break…so I explored a few things around Tokyo with my friend Jun.

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We went to the big Moshi Moshi Nippon 2014 event and were audibly and visually bombarded with all things that were “kawaii”. A good experience, but I don’t think it’s really my scene. I enjoyed the costumes…outfits..and even some of the music, but I rather spend my time eating…or running around somewhere with open air. I like the smell of humans…but not when there are thousands of them smooshing together in dark closed spaces.

On another note, I was looking through my phone and found a bunch of old pictures from April…around the time when I first started training!  They’re mostly selfies…of friends and some Stardom girls…on trains…or …eating …O.o But whatever. I like these pictures.

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Some of these people are old friends, some of them are new.  I’m glad I met all of them.
あたらしとあたらしくないともだち。あいました!うれしかった!
I thought I should put them somewhere I can still see them before I lose or break this phone.  Some things are merely fate ;D.

Kris 1: If a picture is worth a thousand words, then I think I did an ok job this post.

Kris 2: No..you didn’t. You’re being lazy and using pictures instead of exercising your mind.

Kris 1: I really should stop talking to myself.

Kris 2: ~_~;;

Ok.  More ranting another time.  I have to stretch.  My body demands this.