“Make my message matter. Make this chaos count.”
What am I doing?
Am I giving anything to this world?
I want to. Something more than something shiny. I want to make this place brighter. Sometimes it just feels so fucking dark.
What can I give? I drop and pickup at any moment. So I don’t have much. Even the people I love and who love me are always waiting for me to go. That’s what I do best, right? I keep moving. I keep going. I don’t think. I can’t think too much or else I might start to doubt myself. But maybe if I stop for a second I can figure out and see where I’m headed. What am I running to?
In this moment where I’ve pushed pause…I can’t help but wonder…I do all these things that make me happy…
I always do what makes me happy…
how the hell does that contribute anything to the world?
Fuck fuck fuck. There I go sounding like an emo fuck again. I’m not sad. I’m enjoying myself. And I have a lot of things going for me…and amazing people in my life. But there is something more I’d like to give…and there is always something more I’d like to be. Fuck fuck fuck T_T talk to you later peeps. Gotta go train and shut this head of mine up.
Thanks for reading and riding along with me. More thoughts later. Meat. and Peepz.